Saturday, October 1, 2011

Odds N Ends

Went riding with OF (Old Friend of Undesirable Snackage fame) today.  Great ride.  I took the Cartoon Dog with me...she's afraid of everything...the dog, not OF.  Anyway, after our ride, OF did not try to feed me hummus...she did, however, try to make me eat spoiled watermelon and grapes (which she knows gives me the scoots...the grapes, not the watermelon...I know...TMI).  This may be getting to be a habit for OF.  She offered Blondie some salad one time...made of liquid lettuce...you know, the kind that's been sitting in the crisper (aka/rotter) for too long in a plastic bag, and turns liquid with age??  Note to self...always be suspicious of OF's offer of snackage after a ride...

On the way home I went through town and passed two, count 'em, two large Scooter People chugging along down the busy main drag (actually their motorized scooters were doing the chugging, not the Scooter People themselves).  Now, call me crazy, but shouldn't Scooter People be subject to traffic laws like any other vehicle?  These people were driving their little motorized wheelers directly into oncoming traffic.  I almost hit one when he got close to the white line.  Okay, maybe it wasn't that close, but it startled me enough to make my hands tingle...that's what happens to me when I get startled...my hands tingle...weird, I know.

What happens if one of the Scooter People hit your vehicle when you're at a stop sign or stop light?  Do they have insurance?  I'm thinkin' it's highly unlikely...and let me tell you, the way our cars are made these days to dent and cave in to the least little pressure, a 500lb Scooter Person plowing into your fender would probably cause a serious amount of damage.  Think of the carnage...to the vehicle I mean.

I know this is wrong on soooo many levels but this is the kind of stoopid shit I think about...so beware of the Scooter People roaming the streets of your city and give them a wide berth. It's the stoopidist thing.

P.S.  Apologies in advance to all the safety conscious Scooter People who may have been offended by the contents of this post.