Banned

Greg Gutfeld is on a daily talk show called The Five.  He's also on a late night show called Red Eye. I think he's really funny...and smart.  In a Dennis Millerish sort of way.

On The Five, Gutfeld has a little segment called "Banned Phrase/Word" or something close to that. One of the most recent banned was "With all due respect"...because generally if you preface your comment with that phrase, you think the person you're speaking to is a fucking moron, or your boss, or both...but you don't want to say that out loud.

Today I'm going to start my own little ban...the first ban will be the improper use of the word "like". Used properly, you might say "I like apples".  Used improperly, you might say "She came up to me, and I'm like, what do you want?".   Why do people say this?

Who started this?  Is it so hard to use the word "said"?  Because that's what you mean, really, isn't it? It makes everyone sound like Valley Girls.  Fer Shur.

This has become so widespread that everybody does it.  You hear it on TV, you hear it on the radio...it's everywhere...(kinda like lesbians... They're Everywhere   ...only annoying)...I'm like, he's like, she's like, you're like, everybody's like using the word like improperly.

I'm like, totally annoyed...it's like, the stoopidist thing...

P.S.  And with a nod to Bill Mahr, New Stoopid Rule... from this day forward the use of "Valentimes" instead of the correct "Valentines" is absolutely forbidden by everyone in the universe.